Brooding. Abs. David Lynchian creepiness. These have historically been associated with comic book badass are now associated with the pretty wholesome comic book character, Archie. Well, there was that time Archie met his grisly end or the time he met The Ramones (he also has encounters with both The Punisher and The Predator), but for the most part, this is a pretty tame comic series.
Well, hold on to your hats, because Archie, Jughead and the gang are heading to dark waters of Existentialville with the CW’s new “Riverdale” show. From the trailer above, I gather that the lovable gang takes a break from eating hamburgers and kicking Homer Simpson out of their beloved town and get caught up in a … murder?
What the (REDACTED)? *deep sigh*
Now, the question I will raise is: Who the hell asked for a dark and gritty take on “Archie?” Seriously, who asked for this? It is not even that I am a fan of the “Archie” comics. I am just sick of seeing everything getting a gritty reboot. Remember when McDonald’s gave us the dark re-imagining of the Hamburglar? I do. I will never forget that garbage. And here we are, “Archie” of all things getting this treatment.
Well, pilot writer and Archie Comics’ Chief Creative Officer Robert Aguirre-Sacasa told Comic Book Resources “Something we talk a lot about is, “Imagine if Riverdale were like ‘Twin Peaks,’” and was a really weird small town. But “Twin Peaks” had some very funny black humor stuff to it; obviously it was very serious as well. So that kind of balance is what we’re going to try to strike with the show.”
Nope. Just — no. This is too insane, and let’s face it, 2016 has been a pretty crazy year. We don’t need to kick-off 2017 with “Archie” meets “Twin Peaks.” We already have “Twin Peaks” returning. This just sounds like a very misguided concept that should have not gotten this far.
“Riverdale” premiers Jan. 26 on The CW.
The JOE-DOWN 